silly things you have done?

Post by **cadetchris** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 10:46 pm

whats the daftest thing you have done whilst fettling with a car??

mine was undoing the u-bolts on the rear spring of my landrover, upon getting to the last nut, i dawned on me that instead of the landrover sitting on the spring, it was hanging from the spring. the nut suddenly threaded itself, fell off the bottom and the whole landrover dropped down 6inch and the petrol tank and towbar stopped a mere inch from my forehead.
all i could do was laugh at the very near miss i had just had. either laugh or cry in that situation

Post by **bmcecosse** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 11:40 pm

That wasn't daft - that was just plain stupid. You could have killed yourself. Surprised you say 'petrol tank' - under the front seats in any Landys I have been involved with - no-where near the back axle!

Post by **limegreen** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 12:43 am

One of my first actual driving experiences, probably.
I was in an old Rangerover Vogue (Automatic) on on the land we use for the 4x4 driving school.
I managed to floor it off the top of a large mound, (having missed the old brake pedal - first time!) get a good foot or two of air whilst my brother and I (he was 12, I was 15 at the time) giggled hovering above our seats.
Needless to say, we hit the ground with a rather unceremonious and violent bump, the bonnet came up and the battery (and half the engine, probably) fell out. Imagine, a Rangerover that had been left in a field for the past few years - more than a little rotten and cow-chewed - hitting the floor like that. The poor thing had to be pulled apart for surviving parts and scrapped.
The look on dad's face was priceless - he'd given my brother and I that Rangerover as a toy to keep us amused while he worked on the driving school vehicles. Our destroying of it was an excuse for him to move us onto manual gearbox control though, so in a way it was a good thing... not that he actually taught us. It was more of a "Okay, get in that, push that, and change that when it sounds bad. You know where the brakes are. Go. I'm working here."
Soon enough, we were happily pottering about in manuals, 'follow the leader' was always a good game!

One thing I did learn: Brakes don't work in mid-air!

Post by **ASL642** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 8:47 am

Air brakes ?

Post by **limegreen** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 9:37 am

regaliaqueen wrote:Air brakes ?

That would have been useful!

Post by **cadetchris** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 10:59 am

my landy was a huge 12 seater safari, hence petrol tank was behind the rear axle

Post by **cadetchris** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 10:59 am

just remembered another "incident"
allow me to set the scene, i had spent all day mending the indicator lights, oiling the right and sometime the wrong bits. i had given it a clean, and i stood back i awe at my lovely landrover.
considering it was good friday, i decided to go tothe pub and meet some friends, so i get off down my favorite road through stenwith and then muston as i headed towards bottesford and my final destination of the bull inn.
as i headed through stenwith and around the right hand bend, before the canal bridge, i spotted a pheasent crossing the road.
my first instinct was to swerve and miss it as i didnt want to hit it and then have to spend saturday scraping pheasent of the diff housing.
as i was doing the speed of my antilope, i swearved and missed it, but i over compensated and swearved over to the otherside of the road and unable to keep it on the tarmac, it mounted the verge and then proceeded to bury its self in a very large hawthorn hedge.
buried to such an extent, that the entire drivers side was in the hedge as well as the bonnet, righ upto the windscreen. so to say the least i was a little stuck.
now, as one would expect, i put it in reverse and tried to pull my self out, but with the sound of a reving engine and a tyre digging in, nothing happened. i then put it in low ratio gears and again reversed, but again with the sound of a reving engine and a spinning wheel, i didnt budge.
next, it dawned on me, that i had four wheel drive. i put it in 4xdrive and reversed. again nothing.
at this point i got out and discovered that i was not only buried in the hedge, biut i had managed to ground the entire 3 tones of landrover about 1 foot off the floor, with the exception of the rear passenger wheel, which was upto the hub in mud.
being of good british breeding and being able to cope with any situation nature or i could throw at me, i walked calmly to a farm house about 50 meters from me. iasked very nicely and the chap came with his big 4x4 and attached a rope to my rear xmember. at this point he said "give me a moment to engage the front wheels".
stupid blonde sod of me, didnt engage the two front wheels when i put it in 4x4 mode, so although it was in 4 wheel drive and th power was getting to the front axel, it was not getting to the wheels as they where completly disengaged. hinesight is a wonderful invention really.
anyway, he maneged to pull me out and we both came to the conclusion that i wouldnt of got out of the hedge by meyself.
so, what damage occoured.
well, apart from a sore ankle, i am ok.
the landrover has most of a bush behind the front bumper, a loose number plate, one of the indicator lens had disappeared, the ariel had been bent as well as the mirror (but not broken) and the entire drivers side wing had a couple of dints in it and a new crease. the entire drivers side is covered in a nice aray of scratches and the fan belt has been pushed off.
however, these are all now fixed and i think i will leave in the scratches as they add charcater to it.

Post by **heathy12** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 11:38 am

Knocking out the pin holding the handbrake in the ON position whilst the car was on a slight slope with one rear wheel off the ground.
Drum stopped three inches from my leg which was under the car and the alxe stand prevented the weight of the Pickup rolling onto my leg by holding it off the ground - very dodgy!

Also have a 8 inch scar on my leg from a Minor I was chopping up - jagged bit of metal was sticking out and I walked past, lifted my leg up as you do when you walk and gouged half inch into my left calf muscle.

On another note I had my toe/foot run over recently at work....by a 747! Not reccomended! Little accident prone here!

Do I win????? MR Disaster zone 2009!

Post by **Dru** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 2:48 pm

I managed to perch an MG in a tree, when reversing down a Welsh track and hitting the accelerator instead of the brake. Good job the tree was there, really, or I'd have been at the bottom of the mountain...

Post by **Sidney'61** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 2:59 pm

A friend of mine took the roof off the rear of his series I landie and left it on the driveway, inevitably forgot about it and proceeded to reverse over it and crush the whole thing.

I'm not experienced enough to tell you stories of my own yet, ask me in 10 years time...

Post by **mckenzie** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 3:57 pm

Said I DO

Post by **paulk** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 6:38 pm

While reversing an Automatic triumph Acclaim, had the door open to see where I was going.
My wet boot slipped off the brake and floored the throttle sending said Acclaim at great speed into a ditch.
Only problem was I happened to pass a tree in the process. This tree wrapped the open door around itself before whacking it against the front wing and somehow trapping my foot under it.(don't ask me how that got out there I don't know

)

Eventually helped out of car confused, Embaressed but totally unscathed.

Car dragged out by Passing Diggar and 1 scrappy door later did me for a further year before being flogged for scrap. Was seen back on the road 1 week later

Post by **paulk** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 7:10 pm

Oh another time with th e same car.

On way to University for first time I drove into small car park to phone parents to say I'd arrived safe( long before Mobiles).

As I enter car park, huge bang and crunching noise from above and something flies past rear window heading toward ground.

I'd forgotten I had carefully clamped my much loved Raleigh Routier Bike upright on its special roof rack

Low height barrier had caught bike front wheel, Rack was ripped off gutters of car, Put huge dent in roof 1/4" in front of rear screen and beat several shades of (insert rude word) out of the boot lid from 1/4" behind rear screen to the edge.

So in a split second I had totalled my bike ,my roof rack and my car (although I drove that for a further 2 years

)

Post by **Mogwai** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 7:29 pm

the joys of automatics
Had a 164 on the ramp & got out to listen to an engine noise. it also had a worn gear selector so i thought it was in neutral but was actually in reverse as I revved the engine it lunged backwards enough to get onto a slight downhill bit, no stopping it then as it left the workshop dragging me behind it until it slammed into the side of a Brava wiping out both doors.
The 164 was fine though

Post by **Dean** » Thu Sep 24, 2009 8:11 pm

If I bang my head once more on my moggies bonnet...... my eyes water everytime. I do it at least twice when working under the bonnet.

Post by **Mick_Anik** » Fri Sep 25, 2009 9:22 am

phwoo

Post by **Cam** » Sat Sep 26, 2009 8:59 pm

Drove my friend's brand new Audi RS4 (about £54k at the time) in a rather spirited manner a few years ago and after I had parked up I applied the handbrake but had 2nd thoughts about leaving it in gear in case he started it in gear so I did not.

Anyway, I did not realise but the rear disc brakes had heated up during the spirited driving. When they cooled off later on the handbrake released slightly and the car rolled off down a small decline and hit a bollard (luckily not a concrete one) breaking the bollard!

I have never been so embarrased or apologetic in my life!!

Luckily my friend thought it was hilarious and it only bent a bracket slightly which was repaired quite cheaply.

I now double check handbrakes, turn wheels towards kerbs and leave cars in gear!!

Post by **bigjohn** » Sat Sep 26, 2009 11:32 pm

Dean wrote:If I bang my head once more on my moggies bonnet...... my eyes water everytime. I do it at least twice when working under the bonnet.

i know how that feels

iv now got a large car wash spunge and cut a hole through the center of it length ways and keep it under the bonnet when i lift the bonnet i put the spunge over the catch and no more watery eyes

Post by **Peetee** » Sun Sep 27, 2009 12:13 am

Marshalling one of the works 7.5 tonners I drew the short straw and got the one with the dodgy hydraulics. For the first few mins the clutch is incredibly heavy and it helps to hold the revs up to charge up the system. The only way to test if it's ready is to operate the clutch. In first gear I released the pressure on the clutch. The pedal literally threw my foot off and the truck lurched away throwing me back in the process. Frantically I shove my foot towards the brake pedal but catch it too high and without realising I'm shoving frantically at the pedal pivot which is going nowhere. 3 seconds after take off I've ploughed into the back of an escort van.

Post by **Pyoor_Kate** » Mon Sep 28, 2009 10:24 am

Driving my old Yugo (45a, the one with no servo) where braking was a 'book in advance' procedure and involved me putting all of my weight onto the pedal...

...rounded a corner on a single track road near my mum's house at a sedate 30mph (it's 60 limit), espied the mud coating the surface (it's in between two fields) and then the car coming the other way. Did my traditional foot *hard* on the brake...

...one slide, bank mounting and thump later and the car was parked upside-down (still running) with a great crack in the windscreen.

We got it the right way up again, but he'd not start, and ended up in a scrappy...

Or driving back from London with a failed alternator (at night). It was when the dash-lights ceased to illuminate that I realised I'd pushed my luck a bit far - made it to my friend's house, though, thankfully.

And riding my old MZ to London to be repaired. This bike was sans 3rd and 4th gear (the selector having wandered off somewhere quiet to have a nice rest) and the alternator had failed completely. My solution? Bungee a spare car battery to the back seat and wire that in. About 30 miles outside London the bike started to exhibit fuel issues, usually related to needing the fuel feed switching to reserve. This I did but the bike continued to stutter and we landed up on the hard shoulder.

I realised that the overly vibey sickly engine had managed to shake the carb loose, reattached it and headed off again, not realising I'd left it on reserve. Of course this time, as I get to the M4 bus lane, the bike dies again, really of running out of fuel. I realise I'm stuffed because it's already on reserve... and am sat on the central reservation.

The police stopped the M4 so I could conduct a 'mad dash' with the bike from the centre to the hard shoulder; whereupon we had a chat. Apparently 'bungees are not sufficient' for holding a battery onto a bike ;)